Tag Archives: Google

This is Funny, NO?


So before we get to the funnies, here is one for the Game Of Thrones Fans:

Game of Thrones characters re-imagined in 80s/90s style

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Now back to what you here for:

If we could have any voice for our nav system, we’d choose Morgan Freeman. YouTuber Josh Robert Thompson envisions a GPS that not only sounds awesome, but also provides sage advice.

So i hope you got into the Morgan Freeman rhythm,because guess what he is back again in a new movie best described as:

It’s like “Limitless”… but with a girl.

The movie is : “Lucy” (Feat. Scarlett Johansson)

And here is to my Best Villain of all time:

THE JOKER

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GAME OF THRONES “SOCIAL MEDIA|

The “Game of Thrones” title sequence just got a nifty makeover by Hootsuite, featuring Facebook, Instagram, WhatsApp, Google, YouTube, Twitter, Snapchat and LinkedIn.

 

Every Facebook Invite from Your Party Promoter Friend


Every Facebook Invite from Your Party Promoter Friendย by Hallie Cantor (CollegeHumor)

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YES,I TROLL: SLEEP EDITION


So basically after College Humor,my inter web activities seemed limited until i found this wonderful site called 9Gag which Ladies Under Gentlemen is very very cool,trolling all night and day has never seemed so much more intriguing than playing Super Mario(for all those who haven’t played it “4 SHAME”…

So basically i tend to pick out the posts that bring me the greatest joy and share them on my blog so as to entice your readership as well as have them on standby so that anytime,current company is boring i.e Adam Kiboi decided to go on random adventures that lead to possible arrests or Reuben Mungai decides to pass-out or Doreen Gakii decides to go on about some meaningless thing like how “I should Google every annoying thing that she says” or decipher one of her blonde comments,i can just switch on my opera mini and have myself a laugh.

So before i bore you with all these words,onwards to the funny pages ๐Ÿ˜€

THE SLEEP EDITION

Are you safe?

For all you who are faced by such hard decisions i suggest you get yourself aTeddy Bear because they tend to do their part when you go Beddie Bye-Bye

Have you ever wondered how sometimes your dreams start all innocent and peaceful and before you know it things get messed up and you don’t know how it happened well using the illustration below the whole concept is analysed and an answer can safely be assumed to have been reached ๐Ÿ™‚

Da Fuq

and by the way i know you have all been curious to discover whether The Very Dark Lord Vader does other stuff with the Force unlike the rest of the goodie-goodie two-shoes….*long whine~*The Force should not be abused*long whine*, well here is proof to satisfy your curiosity ๐Ÿ™‚

May The Force Be With You

ad

Battle of The Sexes:ROUND 2


At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down

Finally , the guys’ side of the story.
( I must admit, it’s pretty good.)
We always hear ‘the rules’
From the female side.

Now here are the rules from the male side.

Please note.. These are all numbered ‘1’

ON PURPOSE!

1. Men are NOT mind readers.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You’re a big girl. If it’s up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don’t hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports. It’s like the full moon
Or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!

1. ‘Yes’ and ‘No’ are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it.

That’s what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.

1. If you think you’re fat, you probably are.
Don’t ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one

1. You can either ask us to do something
Or tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color..

Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched.
We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say ‘nothing,’ we will act like nothing’s wrong
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don’t want an answer to,

Expect an answer you don’t want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere,

absolutely anything you wear is fine… Really .

1. Don’t ask us what we’re thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball or golf.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

1. Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
But did you know men really don’t mind that? It’s like camping


Haven. . .

A look in the mirror…


My self portrait shows a man that the wealth tortured
Self-absorbed with his own self-portrait
A shelf full of awards
Worshiping the war ships that set sail on my sea of life
When I see my own self I wonder if we still see a light
We was tight seeing lights
Speaking right and breathing life
Now I see my demons and barely even sleep at night
I don’t get high…life keeps me at a decent height
As the old me I predicted all my recent plights
Exhausted. Trying to fall asleep. Losses at my recent fights
Burdens on my shoulders now, burnin’ all my motives down
Inspiration drying up, motivation slowing down

I’m begging me don’t let me go
We vow like the letter “Oh”
To never go our separate ways
And spin-off into separate shows
Tired of all the wardrobe changin’
Playing all these extra roles
Filled with all these different spirits
Livin’ off these separate souls
Point in life is getting hollow
Can’t wait for the exit hole
Give me room. The entry room. Let me in and let me go
So I can roam around this wilderness
See it for what it really is
I’m prepared to filter list
Magnify the youth in me, alibi the shootin’ spree
Amplify the revolution, sanitize the lunacy
Strip away the justice, justify the scrutiny
I can see the lasers shootin’ out of you and me

Sometimes I feel like the world
Sometimes I feel like the world is against me
And everything that I’ve done before
I swear we used to be so pure
But we can’t be in love no more
Cause I don’t wanna fight this war
But when I put down my gun
I turn around and pick up one
This uzi weighs a ton, but I think I’m done!

Lupe Fiasco Edited

‘What THEY think YOU should know’


So after extensive research, and concentrating on more important things than the cure to HIV/AIDS or Cancer the following compilation was reached for the better good of the Human Populus(Meaning you and me :p ),so read and be enlightened coz some of this stuff is actually…interesting :

The word “queue” is the only word in the English language that is still pronounced the same way when the last four letters are removed.

Beetles taste like apples, wasps like pine nuts, and worms like fried bacon.

Of all the words in the English language, the word ‘set’ has the most definitions!

What is called a “French kiss” in the English speaking world is known as an “English kiss” in France.

“Almost” is the longest word in the English language with all the letters in alphabetical order.

“Rhythm” is the longest English word without a vowel.

In 1386, a pig in France was executed by public hanging for the murder of a child

A cockroach can live several weeks with its head cut off!

Human thigh bones are stronger than concrete.

You can’t kill yourself by holding your breath

It’s against the law to have a pet dog in Iceland!

Your heart beats over 100,000 times a day!

Right handed people live, on average, nine years longer than left-handed people

Your ribs move about 5 million times a year, everytime you breathe!

The elephant is the only mammal that can’t jump!

One quarter of the bones in your body, are in your feet!

Like fingerprints, everyone’s tongue print is different!

The first known transfusion of blood was performed as early as 1667, when Jean-Baptiste, transfused two pints of blood from a sheep to a young man

Fingernails grow nearly 4 times faster than toenails!

Most dust particles in your house are made from dead skin!

The present population of 5 billion plus people of the world is predicted to become 15 billion by 2080.

Women blink nearly twice as much as men.

Adolf Hitler was a vegetarian, and had only ONE testicle.

More people are killed each year from bees than from snakes.

The average lead pencil will draw a line 35 miles long or write approximately 50,000 English words.

More people are allergic to cow’s milk than any other food.

Camels have three eyelids to protect themselves from blowing sand.

The placement of a donkey’s eyes in its’ heads enables it to see all four feet at all times!

The six official languages of the United Nations are: English, French, Arabic, Chinese, Russian and Spanish.

Earth is the only planet not named after a god.

It’s against the law to burp, or sneeze in a church in Nebraska, USA.

You’re born with 300 bones, but by the time you become an adult, you only have 206.

Some worms will eat themselves if they can’t find any food!

Dolphins sleep with one eye open!

It is impossible to sneeze with your eyes open – DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUH

The worlds oldest piece of chewing gum is 9000 years old!

The longest recorded flight of a chicken is 13 seconds

Queen Elizabeth I regarded herself as a paragon of cleanliness. She declared that she bathed once every three months, whether she needed it or not

Slugs have 4 noses.

Owls are the only birds who can see the colour blue.

A man named Charles Osborne had the hiccups for 69 years – I think i like that special number ๐Ÿ˜‰

A giraffe can clean its ears with its 21-inch tongue!

The average person laughs 10 times a day!

An ostrich’s eye is bigger than its brain

Revised Curriculum by Sandra Odundo


Seeing as in this new age of communication is rapidly changing,i wasn’t tht shocked when i was sent a text consisting of the newly revised curriculum of Kenyan Methalis by Sandra Odundo(a very fast uprising star mind you…infact she is coming soon 2 a t.v set near you if that is you are in the 254,well known for starting the phrase Eazaeee) thus she is very credible…

NEW KENYAN METHALIS’
1.Ummoja ni estate,utengano ni setbook
2.Mbio za marathon huishia kwa Balcony
3.Cha mlevi huliwa na Mututho
4.Mwenye macho hanywi chang’aa
5.Asiyekubali kushindwa atakuwa Prime Minister
6.Cha Mututho mwanafuu hu,na akinywa ha
7.Cha mlevi,huliwa na makarao
8.Ukistaajabu ya Musa,haujaona ya Onyancha
9.Mpiga ngumi ukuta ni SONKO
10.Usipoziba ufa,watu watakuchungulia
11.Mwenye nyege haambiwi tazama
12.Kidole kimoja ni jina ya Church ya HELLON
13.Asiyefunzwa na mamaye,hufunzwa na GOOGLE
14.Leo ni Leo msema kesho ni fan wa Arsenal
15.Chelewa chelewa utakosa spot ya kuwa bibi ya Wanjiru..

Its a new age for our future Generation,so stick in school and enjoy this new curriculum